Category: A Dog’s Life

Author Jon Katz on Midlife and Dogs

My mom is a long-time fan of author Jon Katz. As a fanatical but fussy reader of murder mysteries, she really liked his Suburban mysteries. She was thoroughly bummed when Katz’s publisher discontinued the series.

But she admired Katz’s pilgrimage to the mountain and she reads his books on dogs. She just read me this article about Katz’s work as a hospice volunteer.

“Maybe we should volunteer your services,” she said, looking me over with a critical eye. “But you couldn’t greet your favorite people by jumping on them.”

Moi? Jump? Who’s she talking about? Anyway, my fans adore me.

Advice from the Psychic Visitor

Ellen is a party entertainer who works with tarot cards and astrology. My mom scoffs but she’s always eager to get Ellen’s celestial advice. She says Ellen is more businesswoman than reader. Ellen has amazing intuition, she says. She’s more like a natural psychic.

So she asked Ellen to “read” the cats. And she was thrilled when Ellen said, “Ophelia wants affection. She needs more cuddling and patting.”

So Mom took Ophelia into her lap immediately. Sure enough, Ophelia purred so loudly we could hear her clear across the room.

But what about me? Ellen said I am a “spoiled canine.” Just because I tried to eat the tarot cards. Big deal.

So much for psychic powers. I’m not spoiled. I just know a good dog mom when I see one.

Our housemate is turning yellow

On Saturday my mom took Ophelia to the vet. Despite the advice of the behaviorist, Ophelia was not responding was not eating as much as my mom had hoped.

Dr. Angel took one look at Ophelia’s ears. “Yellow!” she exclaimed. “Liver disease!” She gave Ophelia some fluids and announced, “We’re sending out the blood tests. Come back Monday.”

Cathy went home with a few cans of special liver food and instructions to force feed. Ophelia also gets pills to stimulate her appetite and get over an infection she picked up.

Cathy was very bummed.

Appetite? I think Mom should take Ophelia to the park and let her run with me. A few rounds in the fresh air would do wonders for anybody’s appetite. I could ask my dog friends to chase her a little.

Ophelia gets brave

Wow…Ophelia marched right into the living room and took up a position near the sofa. She tried to jump to the sofa arm but couldn’t quite make it. Then she sat on the floor all evening while Cathy worked on her laptop. She growled when Creampuff seemed interested. Creampuff took off.

My mom was thrilled. Frankly, I think observing our cats is like watching paint dry, but hey…what do I know? I have a dog bed in every room and nobody messes with me.

Halloween starts early at the Dog Lounge

So mom leaves me at the Downtown Dog lounge while she goes gadding about with my Uncle Lance. They went to the Farmers Market where I’m not allowed. I love the Dog Lounge. Today I spent a few hours with Summer and Sue. They dressed me up in a Halloween costume and took my picture.gracie in halloween costume

If you look closely you’ll see I’m putting up with this fuss because they’re so nice. I get lots of attention whenever I stay there. But hey, I’m a dog. Dogs are supposed to be naked. My mom knows that. She won’t even buy me a cute little winter coat.

My mom hates Halloween. One year someone persuaded her to go to a party. (Of course I wasn’t even born then, but I hear about it every year.) Cathy dressed up as a hippie. She wore beads and tattered old jeans. Several people asked why she hadn’t come in costume. I guess Cathy was even more fashion-challenged than she is now.

That was her last Halloween party. For life, she says.

Copywriting Tips My Mom Learned From Her Cats

My mom Cathy wrote a funny article about how the cats taught her to be a better copywriter. You can read the article here.

My favorite:

#1: Walk on the edge and take some risks.

These lazy good-for-nothings take no risks. Ophelia’s too fat to jump up on the counter to eat dinner, let alone walk on the edge. Of course my mom wrote this article when she still had Tiger, who was jumping around almost till the day she died.

#3: Expect to be appreciated.

Mom got this one wrong. “Dogs beg for attention,” she wrote. “Cats take it for granted.”

Ex-cuuuse me! Do I beg for anything that doesn’t promise food? I get all the attention I need without asking. And then some.

And #10: Who cares if someone hates you? There’s always another food dish around the corner.

All I can say is, don’t count on it. And the cats can give you all the copywriting tips. I’m the one who keeps you going when your schedule gets crazy and you need a little love…or a LOT of love.

And now I shall return to my nap. We had a beautiful day at the dog park, didn’t we? Who forced you out the door to enjoy this beautiful weather?

Next article, Mom: 10 tips on enjoying life I learned from my Canine Urban Princess – the world’s first CUPPIE.

Secret Agent Gracie? Or Princess Gracie?

Here I am at the Downtown Dog Lounge, greeting my faithful subjects, Summer and Cynthia.

dog with sunglassesAs a CUPPIE, I don’t spend much time in the big play area with the other dogs. I sit on the couch and get the respect I so richly deserve.

My mom says this picture makes me look like a Secret Agent. Well, no one is better at sniffing out food.

But I’m a celebrity. Didn’t Jackie-O have big sunglasses?

Under the weather

Aargh…yesterday my delicate digestive system created an unsightly mess when we went our walk. My mom dragged me off to the vet. Do you think she was worried about me? Nope…she doesn’t want me to drag pull her out of bed at 3 AM with an urgent need to do my business.

So I got prodded and poked and jabbed. Ouch! That nice Dr Morris said I need antibiotics in case there’s an infection. That nice Malari jabbed me with a needle so I’d get better faster.

Look, just tell my nice owner, my mom Cathy: enough with the walks and the running! I need a rest. She’s tired too but she’d never admit it.