Cats are so dumb…

…and I nominate Creampuff as our very own candidate for Feline Airhead of the Year.

We have a small laundry room in our apartment. My mom keeps the dog food and cat food there. When she goes in to scoop up my daily ration, Creampuff races inside and hides behind the washing machine. Cathy turns out the light and leaves, closing the door. One minute later, she opens the door…and there’s Creampuff, waiting to jump out. You’d think we’d forced her to go in there.

Occasionally Creampuff doesn’t come out and then my mom forgets…until we hear yowls coming from behind a closed door.

But here’s the mystery. Hasn’t that cat caught on yet? What does she expect to find behind the washing machine: A rare treat? A juicy mouse? A secret door to the outside world?

To be fair, Creampuff really wanted to be an outdoor cat. But she got dumped at a shelter in New Mexico and nobody wanted her. Talk about age discrimination. A two-year-old cat is over the hill.

So when Cathy turned up, the shelter staff begged, “Please take her. She’s been here 3 whole months. So you know she’s flexible.”

Since when was flexibility a valued character trait in a cat? Needless to say, Cathy didn’t probe too deeply. She thought Creampuff was adorable.

Hey, don’t blame me. I wasn’t there. In fact, I wasn’t born yet.

Hmmm….humans have tasteless “dumb blond” jokes. So I’m going to ask my canine friends at the Dog Lounge, “Hey, did you hear the one about the calico cat who …” Works for me.