My mom, Cathy, wanted to write a blog post about being single on holidays. She’s a big fan of Singled Out, by Bella dePaolo: “the best book on being single – and it’s based on science, not silly superstition,” she says. “It’s about time society recognized that some of us are single by choice. We’re not feeling left out or missing out. We’re just … single!”
(Notice how my mom has taken over my blog post. She even added a book cover, knowing I can’t read. How about a photo of a treat instead? Or a new toy?)
My mom says we have to disclose that she was quoted in this book. She’s very proud! And she was quoted because of her success with Amazon book reviews
But here’s my mom’s major beef. She just got an email from a friend in Los Angeles. “When my partner was out of town last year,” he wrote, “I had a wonderful time spending the day alone. I read. I walked. And I took myself out to a movie that evening.”
A few years ago she heard from a colleague in New York. “I’m hiding out this Thanksgivin. Not even answering the phone.”
She wants people to get the message. Grown-up singles don’t want invitations. They don’t need to spend the day visiting other people’s families. They want solitude!
My mom wrote an article on “Being single on holidays,” way back before I came into her life. You can read it here. I think I’ve helped her become a better writer, but that’s another story.
My mom likes to take me to a dog park for the holidays. When she lived with Keesha in Florida, she spent Thanksgiving in a fabulous dog park, reading a book while Keesha played and curled up next to her. (Unlike Keesha, I do not curl up next to Cathy in dog parks. I roam around, looking for trouble. It drives her nuts. Yaay!)
Anyway, if you’re reading this post (and my mom hopes you will), just don’t get offended if single people say “No thanks” on holidays. It’s not about you or your hospitality (although my mom and I both resent the categorization of “waifs and strays” invited for dinner).
“My best Thanksgiving was in New Mexico,” my mom said. “I got to take Keesha for a hike. When we got home our next door neighbor brought over a heaping plate of food. She was an awesome cook. It lasted 3 days. Best of both worlds!”
So…is my mom a Scrooge or what?