“Dog is guilty with mitigating circumstances”

My mom was telling my Aunt Sara, “Gracie’s slowed down a little. She sleeps more. Do you think her hearing is going?”

“No way,” my Aunt Sara laughed. “She hears just what she wants to hear.”

“And she’s even chewing less,” my mom continued. “Definitely she’s getting older.”

So are you, mom, but let’s not go there.

Shortly afterward my mom decided to clean up the living room. Under the coffee table she found the evidence pictured here: Exhibit A. Yes. A chewed-up leather watchband.

“Gracie! Did you do this?!” she exclaimed.

Hey, I was trying to help my mom. First, she was saying she needs a new watch band. This one was falling apart. Knowing how much my mom hates buying things, I figured I’d help her along. And second, she was worried about my age. So I wanted to let her know I’m still in top chewing form.

To my amazement, the mom was not amused. “Gracie, it is SO hard to get a watchband. It’s more expensive than buying a watch. This one still had some life.”

Right! I’ll wait till we see my Uncle Lance. He’s a lawyer and he adores me. I’d bet he’ll represent me pro bono and persuade my mom to drop the whole case. Even she admits, “At least you haven’t chewed up any computer accessories yet.”

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